You Know You're A Mom When...
You're vacuuming and you see a tiny piece of perfectly pink, unchewed bubble gum stuck flat on the tile. You vacuum over it hoping it will get sucked up and when it doesn't you scrape it up off the tile and put it in your mouth and carry on because holding it in your hand while you continue to vacuum would only cause it to stick to your fingers. Gross. Who wants that?
Yes, this really happened to me today. And right this second my kids are in the tub taking a bath before we go to the beach this afternoon. Because maple syrup and sand just don't mix!
Now it's your turn. Finish this sentence with something that has really happened to you since being a mom. You know you're a mom when...
10 comments:
"someone" vomits on you and you'd rather catch it on your shirt than clean it up off the carpet!
you go three days between bouts of morning sickness and think "wow that's much better!"
if you've ever thought "well at least he's bleeding over the tile" when a bloody nose materializes.
sleeping in involves waking up around dawn.
eating after someone is viewed as a legitimate source of lunch.
you do the old fashioned "lick your finger" method of cleaning someone's face.
you're changing a diaper and a piece of something rolls out of the diaper and you don't even use a wipe to pick it up anymore...that just takes too much time and no telling what will happen between now and then. You just go right ahead and use your fingers because hey...it's your own kid's poop! :)
you can hold an enema in your child's hinny and pray, hope, and wait for the poop to come... (now, I don't know if I could hold in my 7 yr old's hinny, or even my almost 5 yr old.. but a 5 month old, I can handle that!)
your child wants an apple... but you don't have anything to cut it up with and in a rush... so you just take a bite off and then hand the bite to your child... repeat.
you can't go to the bathroom without at least one child attached to your leg or lap....better yet, when your son insists on grabbing toilet paper and sticking it between your legs as if you needed help wiping yourself!
Don't worry y'all, knees are tightly locked 2/g.
when you say to the kids, "if you don't stop that I am going to pull this car over and come back there!" I did this today in the van! Oh man, who am I?
you find yourself watching Barney or Dora when your kids aren't even around. Seriously, this has happened to me!
And when you go somewhere fun, like Disney, without them and all you think about is how much you wish they were there, too. :)
you are making dinner, wiping hiney's (wash hands inbetween), put a load of laundry in, answer 10 kid's questions and talk on the phone all at the same time.
You know you're a MAN when....you do ONE of these things at a time!!:O)
You know you will "always" be a mom when your heart hurts for your child.
Post a Comment