Wednesday, May 28, 2008

Things That Make You Go Grrrrrrrrrrr.....

I never knew until I started working at the church how many needy people there are in my community. Many of them want nothing to do with God or the church, but by golly when they're in need that's the first place they come for money! And we do have a benevolence ministry for that purpose, so we are able to meet a lot of needs which is great. But there is this one young man that comes often. In fact, he's a regular on the church property. I say, young, because he looks like he's about 20, but his 17 year old daughter was killed in a car accident last week so he has to be more like my age or older. Although I can't imagine having a 17 yr old, but I guess it's possible if I got started at the age of 17! This young man is somewhat mentally challenged...I think. It's hard to tell. He has tried to get numerous jobs but loses them due to his felony records or bad hygiene. I'm not sure if he's homeless. He certainly has a way of making people feel sorry for him. He's a master at that puppy dog face. Our church has helped him all we can and now I think he just comes around to get sympathy or a quick counseling session now and then or a free Wednesday night meal or something, not sure. Anyways, today he approached Cary and told him that he got a job at Checkers but that the supervisor said she was going to have to let him go if he didn't improve his hygiene. So my dear sweet husband felt sorry for him and went up to Checkers to put in a word with the manager for him, then he went to CVS and bought him a razor and some shaving cream, deodorant, soap, toothbrush, and toothpaste and I don't even know what else. But he said he wanted to do something nice so he threw in a Milky Way candy bar "just because". When he got back to the church, this young man was waiting for him and he gave him the bag of hygiene products and said, "Oh and there's a little snack in there for you too." The young man pulled out the candy bar and said, "What, you didn't get me a drink?!!!" My husband was so mad when he called me. You try to do something nice for someone...Grrrrr...

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sounds just like the one I helped one day. On my way to work I saw her going through the trash on a street corner looking for food. I thought about her all morning then went out at lunch to see if she was still there. She was, so I bought the poor soul a whole meal and drink and she threw the food in the trash and only kept the drink. I was so mad. But tell Cary he did what his heart told him to do and that is the important thing. If you think about their mentality, that is probably why they are on the street, and they know no better. They just want a handout.

You be careful around the church at night by yourself. I know you stay there and work late at night. Those types feel safe sleeping around churches and you could happen upon him in the dark and no telling what could happen. Listen to your mother.

Mom

Mom

Mom

Stef Layton said...

at least your hubby will be blessed for his obedience!

"I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak " Matthew 12:36

Anonymous said...

aww... gotta love mom lectures. :)

Love you, Yvonne!

Just remember God blesses those that bless others.

AdventurerMom said...

yeah...is hardish to feel good about helping people when they don't feel goods about being helped and instead feel entitle-ish. it's been a problemable for the church for a long time, tho' mom was reading about it earliered in 2 Timothy, or was it Titus? anyways, a welfare mentalitys is not new.

Anonymous said...

Cary did the right thing, but it is terrible it is that way. Many of these types of people your blog post is about have borderline personality disorders and are not on meds.

It is sad the number of people working the system. I see quite a few of them at the hospital....

like the lady that asked me if the hospital would give her a free car seat....

or the girl that asked me to get the surgeon to write her a prescription for OTC Tylenol (that way it was free for her). Of course, she was referred to got to CVS, Walgreens, where ever to buy the same stuff we do for the same price we do....

or the people that asked for gas money...

It really makes the ones in REAL need not taken as seriously. But typically, people in REAL need will not ask -- they do what they need to do and are quiet about it. I think it is a pity people that live off everyone else. I never mind helping someone in REAL need that is trying to make it.

Jess Marie said...

My experience of working at the center with drug addicts, alcoholics, lesbians, anger disorders and other mental disabilities (all people who were previously living on the street), as shown me that we just have to have a million times more grace for them than we would others (like you or me). These women have frustrated me to the point of disbelief, but God keeps showing me over and over and over (i'm a little dense sometimes) to just keep loving them, lose my expectations and realize they are completely different and their minds don't work like ours do. And also, they are huge "class" differences that a make a difference of what is considered the norm and acceptable. Which is why the guy probably said that.

And so many weeks I leave going grrrrrrr.... Don't know why I shared all that to say except that this specific type of ministry is very difficult at times, but we have to keep reaching out our hands and extending love (like you and Cary are doing).

And your mom is right....be safe and careful!!!!!