Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Texas Women

I'm gonna let you in on a little secret for those of you who are not Texans. We Texan women, we LOVE our football. Okay, so that wasn't really a secret. But it's true. I think I've mentioned my friend from Orlando who once said, "I've never been to Texas, but I've heard that everyone there loves Jesus and football." Yes, it's true. Even the women! On Friday, I met two men in the airport, also heading to Austin, who were proudly displaying their Miami colors, and it was obvious that they too were headed to the game against A&M. So I went over and had a nice little chat with them, told them how to get to College Station because they were struggling with the maps, told them the best places in town to eat, gave them a little warning about the level of passion of A&M fans. And they asked how many games I attend. I explained that I've had season tickets since I graduated from A&M and that last year I made it 5 Aggie games even though I lived in FL. One man said, "WOW, it's not every day that you meet a woman who is that passionate about football." To which I replied, "You've never been to Texas have you?"
So at the game, I made some observations about the women, who, by the way, were just as much into the game as the men. Here's what I observed:
1. Texas women send their men to the concession stand to get their food and drinks so that they themselves don't have to miss one second of the game!
2. Texas women go to the bathroom BEFORE the game then hold it the entire time because, once again, they don't want to miss one second of the action!
3. Texas women wear interesting things to football games. I saw a lot of girls in mini skirts with tank tops, and wearing these on their feet....
OUCH! I prefer my Aggie flip flops, but to each his own. And if I had a rockin body, I may have also have chosen the mini skirt and sexy boots. Even if I am a pastor's wife.

However, in our family, we dress a little more modestly for the games. My girls don't dress like sissy cheerleaders for football games because we don't have cheerleaders in Aggieland. We don't NEED cheerleaders in Aggieland. We're loud enough without them! So we wear our 12th man jerseys. Because we ARE the 12th man! We ARE active participants!

4. Which brings me to my next observation...Texas women are brainwashed, I mean taught very early in life that we DON'T SIT and be a spectator at football games. If you want to attend a spectator sport, go to a golf tournament. Football is NOT a spectator sport. We are a part of the action. We yell loud. We stand. We scream things at the ref like "GET IN THE BALLGAME REF" and yell things at the opposing coach when he argues with the ref like "SIT DOWN BUS DRIVER!" Of course we never yell obscenities at our own team. That's not being loyal. I did once yell at Oklahoma's Adrian Petersen when he got hurt, "That's what you get for leaving Texas, you traitor!" (He played high school ball in Texas and then left the state to play college football for OU.) Traitor. That should be illegal. He should be shot.
5. Not only do Texas women stand and yell, we do so in the "hump it" position so as to open up the wind pipes and make your voice louder. As is being demonstrated here by my 5 yr old, very well brainwashed, I mean very well trained daughter.
6. Texas women learn very early in life to bow down to the great stadium. I mean, they learn very early in life to RUN, not WALK, to the game. Because when you see the stadium off in the distance, your heart goes pitter patter, and there's just so much joy abounding within you and so much pride for your team that you want to get there as fast as you can. (This picture was un-posed by the way!)

7. Texas women do NOT appreciate this statement after their team has just been outscored..."It's just a game!" Because folks, it's not just a game. Football is life. In Texas.

8. Texas women recognize OTHER women at the game that they just saw the night before at the local high school game they attended so they yell to each other across the aisle and say things like, "Whatja think of that #5 last night, was he ON FIRE or what?" or even better "If that lousy ref hadn't missed that holding call on the last play, we'd of won!" Oh yes, I DID witness this very thing at the Aggie game.

9. Texas women see the infraction BEFORE the ref and even calls the penalty BEFORE the ref ever throws the dern flag. And then they explain the penalty to their husband who has to watch the replay on the big screen! (Uh huh...the lady in front of me...football smarty pants...know-it-all! Takes one to know one.)


Mel :-) said...

Love it!! I agree! :-D
Your Girls look adorable in their jersies! :-) I can't wait until we can take our little Ags to a game!!! :-)

Stephanie said...

Fabulous! BTW, you can add to the part about women not going to the bathroom during the game....."not even if they're pregnant!"
I didn't leave the game to go the the bathroom last year.

kristi said...

you are too much!!!