Friday, December 7, 2007

So Did I Tell You About My Neighbor...

God love him! Shortly after moving to town, Cary and I noticed that every Tuesday night, our neighbor's front yard turns into a parking lot and his back yard turns into a Bingo hall! Complete with a Johnny Cash impersonator. Every week. Johnny Cash. I know what you're thinking. I thought he was dead too. But not so. He is alive and well in Central Florida. He even has a TOUR BUS! Which is also parked in the front yard. Yes, it's a LOVELY neighborhood. Oh, I almost forgot the hot tub. So picture this. 20 or so very elderly people, drinking God only knows what, sitting in the hot tub, listening to Johnny Cash and playing Bingo. Sounds like a good time. On Tuesday nights we go to bed listening to "I fell in to a burning ring of fire...B14, I 3...and I go down down down in a ring of fire, a ring of fire...N42...G7...." I'm really not kidding. Because you know, it woulnd't be a set up without a microphone.

I keep waiting for my Tuesday night invitation and after almost a year, I'm starting to feel ...well...a little snubbed. But I shouldn't complain, I mean he did give us our very own copy of "Johnny's" latest CD. Let me clarify, the FAKE Johnny has a CD of himself singing like the REAL Johnny. Is that legal?

So anyways, my neighbor, probably about 70ish, who always wears a button down country boy shirt with the sleeves cut off, you know, to show his muscles, apparently REALLY LOVES CHRISTMAS! He started putting out his Christmas lights the week after Thanksgiving. I guess that would be last week huh? It feels like forever ago. He started on Monday and each day I would think, "Okay surely he's done now." But each day, he would work from sun up to sun down. He promised he'd be done by Saturday. Saturday came and went. He's been putting things on his lawn for almost TWO WEEKS straight! And the results? Very interesting. Dancing polar bears with penguins (complete with "the clapper...clap on...clap off...the clapper" which makes them dance). Lights. Santa with 4 reindeer. Not sure what happened to the other 4. Lights. A nativity in front of a "fire place". Santa on a trailer. Candy canes. Did I mention lights?

So Cary went over today to "talk smack" and let him know that when we finally get around to taking down the scarecrow, he just better watch out, cause you know, we're gonna show him up! (Right!) Okay, are you ready for this....Are you sitting down??? His last house...BURNED TO THE GROUND because of the Christmas lights display! That was 5 years ago and his wife almost DIED with 3rd degree burns! This is the 1st year that they have done the lights again.

I should post pictures huh? All in favor of pictures?


The Phams said...

John says, " You need to build up too it and DEFINITELY show the pictures."

I agree.

Like, only 2 more days until the pictures. YOu don't want to take premature pictures in case he's not done yet. I would really like a pict. of the tour bus.

Sound like you live in St. Cloud! Do they have aluminum foils on their window.

Kim said...

Gotta love crazy neighbors. When we first got married, we lived across the street from an extremely OCD guy. I watched him check the mail once. He hopped out his front door and down the steps, took giant steps to his mailbox, turned around and did the same thing back to his door.
Funny, but oh, so creepy.

Ashley said...

I will be needing to see some of those pictures and i would prefer pictures with the old man working in the yard too so we can get the full understanding of it all!

that is great!! I love it...johnny cash and least he's still livin' it up and not some mean old man you just sits around and tries to hit kids with his cane...was my grandpa the only one who did that??

Anonymous said...

Want to see pics!!! We have a house like that in our neighborhood. Everytime we drive by I say, "How can they think that looks good????"

Anonymous said...

I can hardly wait to see it in a couple of weeks. I have seen the bus already, at first I thought it was a real rock star over there until I heard the music.

We have a couple accross the street that every day they have put up something new outside. Nothing big, just one string of lights each day. By Christmas they should have all the lights up. My street is so pretty, every house is decorated outside. It looks like a child dream.


Stephanie said...

Is that why he always plays, "Burnin' Ring of Fire?"
And now that the yard is all decked out, where will the others park? Maybe you and Cary could sell spots in your yard, like before the games!Yes, I AM kidding.

So Stephen suggests that you and Cary go to Home Depot and buy yourselves a spray can of flame retardant. Yes, we must see pictures!

Kathryn Evans said...

Welcome to St. Cloud, Sister!!!! And Yes you may want to keep a fire extinguisher close at hand!

Hope the hand bells go well tonight. AW, 4-6 year olds. I hearken back to the days I played handbells all through grade school. How sweet it is!!

Anonymous said...

SCARY, really. One day his house might be that "ring of fire". :) PICTURES, PICTURES, PLEASE- I want to see the tour bus, the bingo cars and all the lights on Tuesday night!


Anonymous said...

We want pictures....we both sat here and read this and we both laughed out loud. That is too funny. That just cracked us up! One question - does he put those lights up in the yard with "plumbers rear-end? We need pictures in Texas to get the full effect!