Home Sweet Home

But before I tell you all about my home sweet home, just a quick public service announcement...BEWARE OF SUGAR FREE LIFESAVERS! And this is not an April Fool's joke, I promise. They can serve as a laxative. Uh huh. Says so right there on the package. Just ask Cary. And Ashton. And my mom. And I'll leave it at that. And now onto much happier thoughts...MY HOUSE! Oh, it's just glorious. I feel like Dorothy from Wizard of Oz every time I venture more than 5 minutes away from home. I just want to click my little red heals together and voila, be standing in my living room! I even decided since we have this beautiful home, why not try to give my kids one of those fancy Potty Barn Kids bedrooms? (On a Target budget of course). You know, the ones from the magazines that kids apparently DON'T LIVE IN??? Seriously. What child's bedroom looks like that, I ask you. Where are the toys??? And boogers? And soiled sheets? And lizard cages? And dirty shoes? And unmatched socks tossed about? And 30 piggy banks (of all different styles)? And crayon markings on the wall? And baby dolls who have received "hair cuts"? And 30,000 stuffed animals? And juice stained carpets? And naked barbies? And fossilized food under the bed? And speaking of fossils, what about the rock collection that grows every time we go to Chili's (don't ask)? But now really, since we started fresh and new in this house, I decided to have a picturesque child's bedroom, free of all that stuff. Well, except for the lizard cage. And boogers. So, what happened to all the other "stuff" you ask? It's in the "play room"...which happens to be the first room you see when you walk into the house. I'm smiling. Can you see me smiling? It's a sarcastic grin. So now I must try to create one of those picture perfect Pottery Barn playrooms, where children apparently DON'T REALLY PLAY! I'm still smiling.